I had something else planned to post today, but I had this dream again and so I changed my mind.  I don’t know if this happens to you, but when I remember my dreams, which isn’t very often, I have a few reoccurring ones.  When I was little, I used to have the same dream every time I would get sick.  Everything in my dream world moved much slower than me and it was all controlled by a big machine that looked like a large propane tank.  Crazy.  I have had a few more over the years but I never really found a connection to when I had them like the sickness when I was younger.

But this most recent one was really weird to me.  Each time I have the dream the storyline is the same but the details and situations change.  I am trying to adopt Jessi (my real life daughter) from this lady.  The lady has some schizophrenic issues.  One minute she is a sane coherent woman and the next she is more or less demon possessed.  She is married to someone I seem to think is the devil.

Now before I move on, I just want to clarify, the crazy demon lady is NOT Kara-Kae (my amazing wife).  Kara-Kae doesn’t appear in the dream.

Through the process of adopting Jessi, she is already staying at my rather large house with a pool and actually sleeping peacefully and restfully in my bed, which she doesn’t do at the crazy lady’s house.  The situation of this dream is during one of those nights.  The crazy lady shows up in the middle of the night and we are arguing about Jessi.  While she is sane she is supportive of the adoption, but when she switches she is violently opposed.  Her devil husband is against it as well.

That’s it.  Then I wake up all battle ready.  I know my daughter is not the spawn of the devil.  She is an amazing little gift from God that gets prayed over every night (crazy dream or not).  I know my wife is not a crazy person, too, so don’t try to put words in my mouth and get me in trouble!  Maybe it’s just a weird dream that I have.  At least I’m always fighting to save my daughter!

So, you go.  You got an interpretation?

Wow.  I sound like the crazy person.

As a brand new daddy I am finally getting to enjoy Father’s Day from a different angle.  It’s kinda weird having a day set aside for you (other than your birthday…which isn’t as big of a deal after you turn 21…until it’s a big deal because you don’t want them anymore).  But since Father’s Day is tomorrow, a Sunday, I expected it to be rather normal with a slight addition of some flair.  You know, the normal work in the morning, special BBQ lunch, Sunday afternoon nap, hanging out with the two coolest girls and possibly tossing in some Wii Fit.  Seems like a pretty nice day.  Nothing too special.

It's just...awful.

Well that’s what I was prepared for.  I should have known better because I know KK likes to surprise me with things (although most of the time she ends up giving it away because she can’t keep it in).  But yesterday morning almost noon I was surprised with an early Father’s Day!  It was great!  Completely unexpected and amazing!  Not only did I get to sleep in until nearly noon, but KK and Jessi Girl came to wake me up!  Then I got breakfast lunch in bed as well as a really sweet note and Tiger Woods Golf for Wii AND a family donation to charity: water!  After playing with Jessi for a while we headed out for a walk through downtown Huntington Beach and a beach stroll.  We had snow cones and Yogurtland and even played a couple rounds of golf.

It was a great day and one that I wasn’t expecting.  I was expecting a lazy day off but was blown away by my family!  I love them so much!  They make for one great first Father’s Day!  And I’m really glad they didn’t buy me some awful tie!

We all have to go through the valleys.  Most of the time we don’t like it.  Sometimes we learn to appreciate how we are growing and hopefully we can look back and (whether we liked it or not) appreciate what wehave been through.  It’s part of what makes us who we are!  Around here mommy makes Jessi do “tummy time” everyday.

She doesn’t like being on her belly.  She does great holding her head up and but of learning process she is not a fan.  She doesn’t know it right now, but this is a major step in her life.  As much as it sucks, there is so much that she needs to learn through this frustrating time.

Our lives are like that.  God puts us in situations and seasons for us to learn.  Many times we don’t like the place He has put us in and we cry, whine and fight it.  But what we don’t realize or think about all the time is that He knows what we need to learn.  He knows the steps that we need to take to get to where we need to go.  He wants us to grow and mature and many times in order to do that we have to go through the rough spots when our neck muscles are getting tired, we are crying and all we want is for Him to pick us up and put us where we want to be.  But He knows we need to learn to crawl before we can run.

Don’t blow off the season you are in just because it is hard/painful/frustrating.  Remember the things that you have been through already that you have learned from and helped shape the person that you are now.  We have to learn from those times when we are too weak to hold our head up anymore.  Thank God for those times and learn what He is showing you!

Well, it’s been a while since I have posted a video of my baby girl, so this week, guess what!  Yup!  Here she is!  This video was actually from a few weeks ago and she has progressed so much since then.  It is a little difficult to get real good video of her because when a camera/iPhone is in front of her she locks onto it and gets distracted (as you can tell in this video).  But she is still ridiculously cute and hilarious.

If you are like me and like to watch videos of my daughter, go to KK’s YouTube channel and keep up with the new ones as they get posted!

Ladies and gentlemen, my daughter is the cutest thing in the world.  If you have a baby, don’t look at pictures of her because I don’t want you to feel bad.  I spent a large portion of the day yesterday just hanging out with my Little One.  We played and slept and laughed and ate and pooped all day.  KK took some “me time” and went shopping.  It was a great Saturday.  Know what follows Saturday?  Yup.  Sunday.  Here’s the setlist for Kingsfield Church!

All Because Of Jesus – Fee – We Shine
Healer – Hillsong – This Is Our God
Closer – Charlie Hall – Flying Into Daybreak
Salvation Is Here – Hillsong United – Look To You

So I have this daughter.  She is gorgeous and funny and happy (most of the time).  What?  Oh.  I’ve told you about her.  Well, she is only 10 weeks old.  And as smart as she is, she doesn’t actually know what’s best for her all the time.  As her parents (and to her future horror), we have to make the decisions on what is best for her.  She would like to do that I’m sure, but she just isn’t quite there yet.  But her stubborn little James self likes to think she knows best sometimes.

When my daughter gets tired, she generally just tries to go to sleep.  But sometimes she gets too tired to know what to do.  She starts fighting the sleepiness.  Fighting the heavy eyes.  Fighting the waves crashing in her ears.  Why she does this I don’t know.  Maybe she is just too tired to be able to decide.  Maybe she is feeling a loss of control and is just trying to hang on.

I wonder how many times we do this in our own lives.  We think we are big enough, strong enough, smart enough to make the best decisions for our lives.  But are we?  Nope.  God is, though.  He is the only one who really knows what’s best for us.  When we are tired and fighting it, He knows we need sleep.  He knows that the rest is the best thing for us.

Are you unintentionally fighting against something God knows is best for you?

Let go.  Find that rest in Him.

I like learning things.  I like to have to figure things out.  When I am not conquering something I get bored.  Forunately, parenting is chalked full of all of that!  Here are 10 of the many things I’ve learned in the first 2 months of being a dad.

• Calming the baby can be quite a workout.  (Screaming + Swinging = Tired Daddy)
• There is not much better than that little smile and laugh.  (Fussing isn’t better.)
• If your baby doesn’t scream, count your blessings.  (And I hate you.  You probably shouldn’t tell me because I will come ring your doorbell during naptime.)
• There is a new center of the world.  (And she poops and pees and cries and thinks I’m funny…sometimes.)
• My wife is and continues to be my hero.  (Seriously this wears me out!)
• Saying goodnight and praying over my daughter is sweet.  (Unless I wake her up.)
• California pays maternity leave.  (Thanks Governator!)
• Paci is spelled paci and not passy.  (Only got that wrong once.)
• If you tell me that my daughter’s paci looks like a penis then we will be getting a new one.  (Just the way it is.)
• It’s all about my girls now.  (I like that.)

I am so blessed.  I am blessed far beyond what I deserve.  I am blessed with a job.  With a huge family that supports me.  With beautiful surroundings.  With a dog that pees every time I get home because he is so excited to see me.  With material things.  With freedom.  With so many other things.

But more than all that l I am blessed with my wife and daughter.  I cannot physically write out all the ways that my wife is amazing.  I can’t physically do it.  She loves me.  Takes care of me.  Cooks for me.  Runs errands for me.  She is such a good mom, too!  She has an amazing ability to comfort our daughter.  She loves her.  Takes care of her.  Sacrifices so much for her.  I could not ask for more.  But I got more.  I have a little daughter who I can’t get enough of.  She is healthy and strong.  She has the most capturing smile and laugh.  I literally can’t get enough of it!  She smiles and laughs and I just want her to do it again!

I don’t know why I have been given so much.  I can’t imagine living without them now.  I don’t know why, but I am so blessed.

I love you, girls.

Wow, I almost forgot to post this for today!  That would have been bad.  I hope you are all having a great Sunday to cap off a great weekend.  I mean, it couldn’t have been too bad considering the Oklahoma City Thunder beat the Lakers.  But enough of that.  Here’s the set for Kingsfield Church!

Jesus Saves – Carlos Whittaker – Carlos Whittaker EP
Came To My Rescue – Hillsong United – United We Stand
Power Of The Cross – Free Chapel – Jentezen Franklin Presents Power Of The Cross Live At Free Chapel With Ricardo Sanchez
Salvation Is Here – Hillsong United – Look To You

PS – My baby girl is officially 1 month old today!  Wow.

It’s hard to believe that Jessi is four weeks old today.  That is insane.  (We are celebrating by going to Catalyst West Coast and getting our spiritual learning on.)  Seriously, it seems like just last week we brought her home from the hospital and we spent the next two weeks trying to figure out how to convince her to stop screaming and go to sleep.  Yeah, we are still working on that one.

It’s crazy to see her growing and developing so quickly.  She came out holding her head up on her own quite a bit, but now she does it all the time.  Now when we try to burp her she tries to crawl up us!  Even Jack is warming up to her.  He still sniffs her every chance he gets, but he has also been caught curling up next to her.  It seems like every day she is making more and more cute little noises.  Before long she is gonna be chasing the dog around, pulling his hair and giggling the whole way…at least I hope so since that means she won’t be screaming and crying the whole time!

Well, happy four weeks, Jessi Girl.  Soon enough I am gonna be trying to convince you that boys are gross!