So I’m driving down the 133 the other day.  If you have driven through Orange County you know there isn’t much room for anything new.  There aren’t vast fields or (as the Dixie Chicks would say) wide open spaces.  But on the 133 between the 405 and Laguna Beach there are hills and wilderness and fields.  There are trails and boulders.  Most of the rest of Orange County is covered with roads, people, buildings, houses, condos, malls, etc.

But in this one area there is a sign up on the hill.  I drive this way nearly every day but I have never seen it before.  It says Open Space Reserve.  In Orange County the money is location location location.  There is so much money to be made in land.  But in this place, in this wilderness, in this openness, there is nothing.  It is preserved to keep it that way.  I love this!  I love that no matter what they could make from this land, it is protected!

In our world of go go go, too often we don’t have our own Open Space Reserve.  We pack our schedules so full of anything and everything.  Many times when we feel the need to fill in every waking minute with something.  But this isn’t healthy!  There has to be a break.  We need our open space for thoughts, for rest, for peace, for reenergizing.  We need our open space for our spouses, for our children, for our families.  We need our open space to hear, to learn, to grow.  We need our open space for God.

Do you have an Open Space Reserve in your life?  Do you need to create one?

Every parent says it.  You hear it all your life growing up.  We have all heard it.  You always think you understand it.  But the truth is, they are right and you are wrong.

Someday, when you have kids of your own you’ll understand.

I can’t thank my dad enough.  I can’t appreciate him as much as he deserves.  Yeah I call him and Skype with him.  I show off my daughter to him.  I ask his advice.  I try to love my wife like he lived it out my whole life.  But still.  He deserves so much more for everything.  For 30 years (nearly) he has showed me how to be a good dad.  If I succeed (apart from the leading and grace of God) at being a good husband and dad, it is because of him.

Today is a day of the year that we kinda celebrate.  It’s not a big of a day as others, but let’s be honest.  Dads wouldn’t want it any other way.  Dads would rather celebrate their kids, their wives, their grandkids than make a big deal out of themselves.  Of course it’s always nice to have a day for some BBQ and other manly things, but what we really want for Father’s Day is not a tie.  It’s not a Dremel (although every man NEEDS one).  What we really want is to love on our family…and maybe take a nap.  We lived our lives for us for 20-some-odd years, but now it is for them.  It is for our wives.  It is for our sons and daughters.  It is for our kids kids.

To my fellow new fathers, happy first Father’s Day!  To all the other dads, happy Father’s Day!

To my dad, thank you.  I love you.  (Aren’t you glad I didn’t buy you another stupid tie?!)

As a part of a band, a staff member and a pastor, I know that a ton of work goes into a Sunday morning church experience.  Despite the sometimes popular opinion that pastors only work on the weekends, there really is quite a bit of planning, studying, learning, practicing, etc. for every week.

BUT before you go thinking that this post is about appreciating your pastors, stop your fingers from typing!

There is so much more to what goes on than just the main people that you see all the time.  There are people that clean, setup, play instruments, take care of kids, fill communion cups, type out and stuff the bulletins, run sound, fix things, and so much more!  I could try list them all, but I would miss something and it would be a really long list.  Without these people the way church is done wouldn’t happen!  The lead pastor, worship pastor, youth pastor and kids pastor could all get there early in the morning, but church wouldn’t be the same.  Coffee may be brewed and on the verge of getting cold, but the donuts wouldn’t have made it, the lights wouldn’t work, no one would be there to watch your kids and the grammar in the bulletins and onscreen lyrics would be horrendous!

So what then?  Am I trying to convince you to become a volunteer?  No.  We would love to have you but that’s not the point.  The point is, that there are so many people that deserve a thank you or butt slap or man hug or whatever beyond the normal church staff.  This week as you go to church look around.  Notice all the other people that are there making things happen.  They are why you enjoy going to church where you do.  God has given them gifts that they want to use to love on you and your family!  Find those people and tell them thank you.  Tell them you appreciate what they do.  Tell them how much it means to you to have a church like you have.  They deserve it!

To all my volunteers over the past decade of church work as if I could say it enough times, thank you.  I know this in no way does it justice, but I just want you to know how much I love you and appreciate you!

You know those people in your life that are not technically family but about as close as you can get?

The ones that would do anything…

have done any/everything…

helped, fed, prayed for, prayed with…

gave a shoulder to cry on (if you do that sort of thing)…

shared in the pain…

just really love you?

I was thinking about some of those people in our lives today.  I love them.  They really are family.  I am so thankful for them.  But what do you do for someone like that?  How can you show them how much they mean to you?  Is saying it enough?  A handwritten note that when turned over says “Hallmark”?  Watch their kids?  Buy them something big…yet smaller than a car?  I don’t know.

What about you?  You know, the ones that when you think about it the first thing that comes to mind is “I’m not sure we could ever make it up to them”.  What do you do for them?

Everything you do is motivated by something.  You set a goal for yourself, whether big or small, and then go for it.  Motivation is what drives us to get There.  But just because you are motivated to do something doesn’t mean you have the right motivation.  The right motivations push us harder toward our goals.  The wrong motivations just prove to be weak and many times we give up on the goal.

No matter what the goal is, you must examine your motivation for reaching it.  Lose weight. Break/make a habit. Write a blog. Learn to surf. All these choices are motivated by something.

• Will more successful weight loss come because the magazines you see in line at the checkout counter say you should or because you want to stay healthy and keep your body in shape?
• Will you be more likely to stop looking at other women because you don’t wanna get caught and sleep on the couch or because you love your girl and want to respect, honor and build her up?

If we are being honest, we would always choose the second motivation to answer the question.  But just because we know that doesn’t mean we always choose that.  You want to be an actor because they make lots of money, not because you love acting.  I buy things because I want people to see me with them, not because I need them.  You write books because everyone else in your profession is a published author, not because you love to write and have something to say.

But the same is true for relationships with Christ. I’m gonna read the whole Bible this year.  Why?  Is it because true Christians have read the whole thing all the way through or is it because I want to know more about Christ and can’t bear to leave anything out?  You are gonna have a “quiet time” with God first thing every morning.  Are you trying to improve your Christian status in your church group or get to know Him better?

Knowing the true motivation behind our decisions and goals is a must.  If the motivation is weak, our effort will be, too.  Examine your motivations.

Are you aiming for your goals because that’s what you are supposed to do or because reaching your goal is something you can’t miss out on?

So I have this daughter.  She is gorgeous and funny and happy (most of the time).  What?  Oh.  I’ve told you about her.  Well, she is only 10 weeks old.  And as smart as she is, she doesn’t actually know what’s best for her all the time.  As her parents (and to her future horror), we have to make the decisions on what is best for her.  She would like to do that I’m sure, but she just isn’t quite there yet.  But her stubborn little James self likes to think she knows best sometimes.

When my daughter gets tired, she generally just tries to go to sleep.  But sometimes she gets too tired to know what to do.  She starts fighting the sleepiness.  Fighting the heavy eyes.  Fighting the waves crashing in her ears.  Why she does this I don’t know.  Maybe she is just too tired to be able to decide.  Maybe she is feeling a loss of control and is just trying to hang on.

I wonder how many times we do this in our own lives.  We think we are big enough, strong enough, smart enough to make the best decisions for our lives.  But are we?  Nope.  God is, though.  He is the only one who really knows what’s best for us.  When we are tired and fighting it, He knows we need sleep.  He knows that the rest is the best thing for us.

Are you unintentionally fighting against something God knows is best for you?

Let go.  Find that rest in Him.

KK, mom, Dodie and Brenda,

Thank you for being you.  You are the women that shape our lives.  You hold us together and keep us standing up tall.  We like to think we are all big and bad, but deep down inside we know that without you all we are lost.

Thank you for taking care of us.
Thank you for laundry.
Thank you for clean bathrooms.
Thank you for home cooked dinners.
Thank you for the laughs.
Thank you for the late nights.
Thank you for the unending love.

We do not express it enough to you.  We love you so much.  But we are men and kids so we think flowers have us covered.  If we were smarter we would do so much more.  If we were smarter we would do so much more so much more often.  Some flowers and a poorly chosen card with “I love you” and our names scribbled on it just don’t do you justice.

But hey.  What can I say?  We are just a bunch of men and kids.  We don’t really know better.  At least it wasn’t another (bead)-M-(bead)-O-(bead)-M-(bead) bracelet this year.  Give it time.  We will get back to those!

• Schedules
• Calendars
• Timelines
• Dates
• Alarms
• ETA

We live our lives by plans.  Some of us live by fewer plans that others do.  Most of us can think of at least one person that is more planned out than ourselves.  Many of us married that person.  But mixed with a good amount of spontaneity, we like to have our lives planned out.  We wanna know when we are supposed to be places.  We like to know when our shows come on.  We like to know when our planes are going to leave.  It’s true.  You can sit there and kid yourself all you like, but the truth is that without some planning we would be in utter chaos.

So we plan.  We look at the foreseeable future (that is really unforeseeable but we just like to think we have some knowledge and control over what is coming up) and we make decisions that affect our lives and determine where we are headed next.  Right?  But then things change that are out of our control and we have to change with them.  Sometimes this isn’t that big of a deal but other times it is extremely difficult.

As much as I like to be in control of my life, a lot of times it is still hard in that situation to see through the changes to the blessing or plan that God has for me on the other side.  It could be the exact opposite of what I had picked for myself, but fortunately God knows what He is doing.

I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.

- Jeremiah 29:11

That is something I can rest in.  That no matter what is going on in my life, He knows what He is doing and has it all planned out.

• When you get pregnant
• When you lose your job
• When you get sick
• When someone you love dies
• When bad things in life happen
• When disaster strikes

He knows what He is doing.  Maybe you can’t tell right now.  Maybe you are scared of what is to come.  Maybe you are having a hard time leaving the worries to Him.  Whatever it is, right now, in the midst of the chaos of your life, stop and remember, HE KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING!  He could be trying to teach you something.  He could be protecting you.  He could be giving you an opportunity.  Who knows?  He could be giving you a daughter that you can’t imagine being without!

It seems like every time I hear Andy Stanley speak, God uses him to blow my mind or rock my world.  And every time I hear him speak I think to myself, why don’t I listen to more of his podcasts and not just follow him on Twitter (@AndyStanley).  Hmm.  Not sure, but I am really glad he does this whole Catalyst thing.

He always says things that make many in leadership positions rethink what they are doing or how they are handling their teams.  At Catalyst West Coast he was speaking on being a better leader and said “your fully exploited strengths are far greater than your developing weaknesses.”  As a pastor I know that this is an easily overlooked or ignored truth.  When the organization is small certain things are necessary, but many times we don’t grow past this.  I have seen it happen with setup/teardown teams, staff members and media teams and I’m sure those aren’t the only ones.

Is it a bad thing to be doing multiple things including areas that are weaknesses?  No.  That’s not what I am getting at.  But at least for me, if I am not careful (which many times I am not) the following things happen:

• I forget is that I am better that my strengths than I am at my weaknesses that I am working on
• I stop using my strengths to their full potential
• I start worrying about how I can make my weaknesses better
• I let my strengths suffer or go unused because my attention to my weaknesses becomes more important.

As it is true with me, it is true with leading my team.  Let’s say for example I have a volunteer that is serving in a capacity that they are just getting by but not being truly utilized.  If I know that they would be much more fulfilled and useful for our common goal, I need to do whatever I can to make sure they get into a position that fits them better!  Even those of us that have to do multiple things need to remember that God gave us strengths and that we cannot neglect those God given strengths because we are spending too much time on our weaknesses.  When we do that, nothing gets done well and everything suffers.

Now you.  Share with the rest of us.  Are you using your strengths as strengths or are you pushing them aside while being distracted by your weaknesses?  Is there someone on your team that you need to move to a different seat?  What do you think?

Go!

As I kick off a new week and I’m gonna take my first stab at trying to digest all that I saw and heard last week at Catalyst West Coast.  One of the things that I have really enjoyed the last couple years at Catalyst West is that they have brought in a Christian comedian for one of the sessions.  It is a great break from the heaviness of the rest of the speakers for the most part and it is very welcomed.  This year they brought in a guy named Michael Jr.  The dude was hysterical!  But more than that he is doing something that I have never seen before.  He is taking his comedy on the road less traveled.  It’s a pretty incredible ministry that he is doing and I wanted to share it with you all this week.  Watch this trailer and then go check out his site Comedy: The Road Less Traveled!