I can’t count the number of times I have experienced Person A who wants Person B to learn or do something that he/she (Person A) isn’t willing to do or just don’t do.  It happens all the time.

Examples:

• A adult tries to teach a child that drinking or smoking is unhealthy but drinks or smokes at least part time.
• A father tells the kids they should go to church but won’t turn off the game to go with them.
• A employer cracks down on tardiness but is consistently late for everything.

For me this plays out in several different ways.  I am a husband, a father and a pastor.  I cannot expect my wife to become a great communicator in our marriage if I am not willing to share my thoughts and feelings with her.  I cannot expect my child to grow up following Christ if I am not living that out in front of her.  I cannot expect the people at church to focus and worship if I am not setting the example.

We live our lives leading (or not leading) others around us.  We want them to reach that next level and become a better spouse or a well rounded child or a more head over heels follower of Christ, but if we aren’t modeling that out for them, how are they supposed to know and learn that it is actually something good for them?  Without real leadership from those before them (spouse, parents, boss, pastor, etc.) it just comes out as talk and probably taken with a grain of salt.

Are you leading those around your sphere of influence to be better or are you just blabbing hollow thoughts that go in one ear and out the other?  Lord, help us learn to lead by example and not by words.

Most of us struggle to fit in for a good part of our lives.  We think we need to be like someone else in order for people to like us.  Then one day you start to learn that a fake you is far worse than the real you.  You start to embrace the goofy, quirky, uniqueness that is you.  We stop trying to be like everyone else in order to blend in.  As we grow up we learn these things.  But then as we move into leadership roles our self-doubt issues come back.  Whether you are a teacher, pastor, lead singer, dad, or manager, the temptation to aspire to lead as someone else comes up.  They are successful.  They are liked.  They do things well.  Maybe I am supposed to lead just like them.

As Christians we are called to be like Jesus, no?  If I recall correctly (and I do), Jesus didn’t blend in.  He didn’t just do what everyone around Him was doing or wanted Him to do.  He was different.  He didn’t lead like King David or John the Baptist or Moses.  He led like Jesus.  We need to learn to do the same.  We need to stop trying to lead like Rick Warren or Steven Tyler or Barak Obama.  Yes, learn from them, but remember that you are not them (unless of course you are actually one of them…but that is very doubtful since you are reading my blog)!  You are you!  God didn’t make every single one of us (except your doppleganger if you believe that sort of thing) unique so that we could all be the same.  There is no logic in that!

God created us all different so why would the way we lead not follow suit?  When I first started leading worship I tried and tried and tried to be just like other worship leaders that I looked up to.  I tried to sing like them.  I tried to choose the same songs as them.  I tried to play the same guitars as them.  I even tried to act like them on stage.  Finally, I came to realize that I am not those other leaders.  I don’t have to lead the way they do.  There is a ton I can learn from them, but at the end of the day, if I am leading like them I am just copying something that God created to be unique.

Your leadership isn’t perfect.  My leadership isn’t perfect.  Learn from others.  But as long as you lead your family/staff/band/team as the you that God created you to be, you are headed in the right direction!  Don’t apologize for not being someone else.

As Genie from Aladdin put it, “Beeeeeee yourself!”